||[Dec. 12th, 2004|09:53 am]
It's been three days. Three days, and still they are here. |
I've tried sleeping, to no avail. I tried simply waiting. I even dared let the change go through, in hopes they would disappear when I came back. When I could find no other options, I asked him if he would remove them. He laughed uproariously then, and has been doing so intermittently since, at this torture.
One further penance, I suppose. I know what this means. As I lose myself the more to him, I can only wonder what will be the next to go, the next strand to be cut of that fragile thread that barely clings to my former humanity.
Odd to wonder...after going through such loss, then torture, then thirty years of sleep. Then to 'save the world'...merely to find myself at this worst of ends. Well, I cannot say I didn't expect it. Every power comes with it's price. Though I was convinced I had paid mine, that seems false, now.
On a more practical note, the wings are unwieldy, but if necessary, I can fold them entirely behind my body, hiding them from view. Maybe, with my cloak, I could go back out into the world and try...
No. It is foolishness to even think of leaving now.
I will not leave here until I am no longer even a shred myself, I think.